talkwithme2.com Blog

“Dividing the Nation”  Well what did you expect?”

For the first time in history we have diversity in the running.  We are an immature society, one that still labels people based on hair color, size, ethnicity, gender, age.  Most do not say “the person that I met with today is a good person.” But, rather it is more common to say “that man/woman,   I met with today is a really smart blond, or a nice brunette.”  You get the idea.  

So then why when Americans have been limited to only white males with an average age of 55-60, does anyone expect anything less?  My greater concern is not who would be the best person for the job, as they are all qualified to one degree or another, or they would not have gotten as far as they have!  But the bigger concern is who will stabilize this country?  It is sad that we would even have to question whether or not we are ready for a “diverse” leader.  After all aren’t we still quibbling about John F. Kennedy having been Catholic?  It amazes me that a country that claims to be a “God-fearing” nation gets hung up on where or how a person worships.  It isn’t enough that they do and that they can make a solid commitment to something. (How many have changed based on constituency?)
So getting back to the issue at hand; Americans are divided, sadly so. Isn’t that a predicted outcome of a two party system?  If there are two or more choices the odds are that there will be division.  Now the bigger issue is that there is an extreme diversity at hand.  I fear that should Senator Clinton be elected, we will be dealing with concerns such as, her husband, her shoes, her skirt, her hair, again falling back into the quasi-caveman attitude of so many Americans.  I would love to believe that we have advanced beyond that.  That there is some degree of sophistication at work to advance our society, but women have only had the vote for less than one hundred years!

Should Senator Obama become our leader then we will unfortunately get bogged down with color, religion, race, etc.  I am sad that that is a reality as well. We should be far beyond this, but prejudice reigns supreme in these parts!  Forget about his brains, his articulate delivery, or compassion.  Again, we are still a Very segregated society on all sides. 

Then there is McCain, this man will have to undo the damage of the past 8 years.  Will he have the support of the nation behind him?  The dark mark on him is that he is a veteran,  (that is unfortunate)  I have even heard some refer to his age?  When did that happen, that age became a concern in politics?  Yes, every veteran should be carrying with them a badge of honor bestowed upon the shoulders of every soldier, again for believing in something and committing to it to the end.  At least there is a definition of who he is, where he came from, and what he believes.

This country has experienced abundance for over two centuries and is now faced with many dilemmas.  The issue of immaturity amongst other nations of the world is evident.  The division is proof of that.  The shrinking dollar, the inhumane way in which we deliver food, medicine and opportunity to those who are marginalized, the way in which we are rapidly trying to take care of the immigration situation.  The list is long of those areas that need addressing and we will be like the old story of the tortoise and the hare.  We are the hare, the young stallion amongst older, wiser nations.  As America has been off and running, considered to be the giant amongst giants, its prideful nature just might wake up 5 years from now and ask what have we done all this time, wasted it on jargon that has no place in a country where we profess to be the great mix and all are free.  What will the media use to make it interesting?

 The tortoise will be those overseas who are currently reaping the benefit and reward by the opening of trade, wait, wasn’t there a time when we looked down upon supporting financially communist countries?  That is another blog all together, but instead of putting a feather in the cap of capitalism or a rabbit foot into the suit pocket of democracy, put a tortoise shell comb in your hair imported from, where?

The Notebook:  I realize that this movie came out some time ago.  It is true I am not an avid movie watcher.   For me catching a flick a couple years after the release does happen sometimes, okay most of the time. It is my norm.  But that is okay for me, as I really do not run with the crowd.  In fact I have this tendency to run away from the crowd.  I just do not like to do what everybody else is doing until it is my doing.  That to most means I am out of the loop.

 The Movie: It was to many the love story of the decade.  Many people told me “go see it”…”just see the movie”…”you have to see it!”  For others it was a nice depiction of true love and the American way.  To others it was shmarmy, a little too sappy at best and a little too unrealistic for a society that has a divorce rate of well over 50%, and an increasing number that classify themselves as domestic partners of both the heterosexual and alternative type.  So, first love being last love?  Hmm, that is a bit much don’t you think? Cynics would agree that that type of love and marriage too? Poppycock! (okay I dated myself)

If you look a little closer into the characters you see truth about relationship and the promises we make or fail to make to ourselves at the core.  First prevalent truth revealed.  It is that the first person that you love, I mean really love, will be the last person that you really love.  Some will say there are many people that you will love in your lifetime.  Common thought is there are many fish in the sea.  Few people buy into the “Penelope and Odysseus” story line. So you could argue this point, or you can identify different classifications of love.  The love that Noah had for Allie in the movie was a total commitment to a promise.  That was his truth.  He could include another woman into his life, his house, but could never promise again that which he promised his one true love.  He would not find home.

The bigger point is this, how many of us do not really love, those which we think are our first love?  Far too often people marry out of pressure, identifying themselves with the, “it is the thing to do.”  Many feel that they cross the point of no return in relationships so they hang on for dear life, or emotional death.  The fear of hurting another and putting their feelings, wants first is not putting them first.  You are actually putting yourself, your guilt, your pain before their own in many ways.  Eventually if you are not really in it for the reasons that you should take a life partner, then it will implode!  You will both end up hurt anyway.

 Noah asks Allie “what do you want?”  She is faced with a decision to go with the one she truly loves or the life that she thinks she loves and a commitment to marry another. Discernment when we must make a choice is indeed a very hard thing.  Whether is entering into anything, job, major purchase, relationships, etc., we can be deluded into believing we feel something we think we feel. We want something we think we want.  Believe something we think we believe.  It only becomes right when it all aligns, when what we feel, want, think, and believe comes together.  It is then that a promise can be uttered.  Then a commitment backs the promise.  Through that we can see absolute truth revealed in our lives. 

Sometimes I wonder if we rush so much into relationships for all the obvious reasons that we ignore obvious reasons why we should not, only denying ourselves that Noah and Allie love.  Did Noah indicate anything to Allie in his youth that he would care for her and make her home even when she did not remember him?  Was there anything that he did which indicated to Allie that he would continue communications even when she forgot home? Yes, he did, he was a promise keeper.  He kept first the promises to himself and then to the ones he loved. He made home and knew that it was the essence of her that would fulfill it and he knew that it was her presence that made home for his heart.

Okay, so it was a movie, but it was more than a movie.  It is a glimpse at something lost in our culture.  We do not love for love’s sake.  We do not marry with the intent to fulfill promises.  We do not keep promises.  More importantly, we make promises we should not make in the first place.  Prenuptual agreements, contracts, keep us all in a state of mind that a promise, a word can be abandoned with a blink of an eye.   Believe me, I am not saying divorce, break-ups are not sometimes necessary.  I have been down that road.  What I am saying is this: We have set ourselves up to avoid the ability to make a long-lasting loving relationship with a promise at the core. We go about it the wrong way. What is necessary to have a sustaining relationship with another person?  What is needed in order to nurture the relationship to a place of health and growth?  I know for myself it is about time.  I struggle to maintain healthy relationships with family and friends and work a full-time job, and take care of me.  How can I possibly give all that is necessary to nurture the man in my life, nurture the relationship if I have to schedule it in?  It is all something to ponder.  There is nothing worst then feeling alone with someone in the other room, or worst sitting on the couch with you.

As for this romantic, I do believe that love like Noah and Allie’s exist.  Maybe, just maybe, we do not always get it. Or, maybe, just maybe, we let the “one” pass us by.  Fear of taking a chance and just going up to the one we are drawn to and saying, hi! We convince ourselves we are silly.   Giving up too soon and listening to others around us when they say, oh, he/she is not for you, there are a lot of fish in the sea, find another to fill your time.  But then again, that kind of thing only happens in movies.

Top Stories

“As they  walk a careful line on the issue, presidential candidates Sen. Hillary Clinton of New York (D-N.Y.) and Sen. Barack Obama (D-Ill.) have offered plans that preserve the existing system while also providing Americans with a “government-run, Medicare-like alternative to compete with private plans…According to the Journal, the shift among Democrats occurred because many decided that a single-payer system could not be achieved politically…” http://www.rwjf.org/programareas/features/digest.jsp?c=EMC-ND132&pid=1132&id=7151
A Las Vegas Review-Journal editorial argues that the top Democratic presidential candidates avoid using the phrase “socialized medicine” when discussing their health care reform plans because of its “negative connotation,” but the reality is that all three “advocate changes that would push us closer to precisely such a system.”
http://www.rwjf.org/programareas/features/digest.jsp?c=EMC-ND132&pid=1132&id=7152
 Okay, so there you have it, two separate quotes from the same Health Insurance update from the Robert Wood Johnson Foundation.  It seems to me that it is politics as usual, “thou dost speak with forked tongue!”  Well, what is it?  Is it hidden socialized medicine, is it a single payer system, is it a single payer system hidden beneath a facade of “well, you see you pay the bill and we reimburse you?”  Seriously, are we that foolish?  How can it be both?  (By the way the Republicans have been promoting what Hillary and Obama, seemingly are promoting for a long time! The Dems have boohoo’d it as it is too costly! But a socialized format is not?)
The way I see it is this.  Stop courting the big problem and get it together.  Identify a strong cohesive model, one that would contain cost, because everybody is buying into it.  Put in place controls like there are in Maryland, controls that limit the gross profits of hospitals, insurance companies, etc, etc, etc!  Then start calling things as they are!  The Big Boys are making a profit off of the indigent, the ill, the marginalized, those who by their circumstances are oppressed by the very system that claims to be deliverers of health care.  Doctors take the “oath” do all other providers? Read Regina Herzlinger’s “Who Killed Health Care?” This book outlines a consumer driven model, one that includes all the players. 
Be realistic, this problem is not going to be fixed with a new President.  It is much bigger, it is bigger than Washington, reform will take real, honest dialogue.  We must be willing to call the issues as they are.  For more insight into this big problem look into, www.jayparkinsonmd.com.  I actually would nominate that guy for President if he were old enough!
Now, as I see it…no matter what issue we focus on, let’s be mindful in electing the next President.  Do we want to spend the next 5 years listening to threats, insults, mud-slinging, can we afford to have constant media diversions?  We need a President that can maintain the focus on issues of great concern to us all.  We need a President that can work with congress to get the job done, so that we are not wasting any more time.  We really do not have that much time before we lose greater footing.  We cannot run the risk of the opposing party spending 4 valuable years to guarantee that the President is not reelected.  My word, will anything get done? Or will we just sit by and watch as our dollar shrinks into the abyss?  The circus that could result from electing the wrong President could be equaled to electing Britney Spears or Paris Hilton.  My point is that sometimes we maybe need to be very Machiavellian in our approach and focus on the good of all.  Sadly we are a Very immature country with a whole lot to learn.  If we can see waffling so soon with regards to health care for example, will we not see that in everything else as well?
It is food for thought I am just dishing out a few morsels of information, for whatever it is worth.  More to come regarding the things that matter to ME.
Blessings!
 
 

Today I celebrate the beginning of yet another month.  Where did January go, wasn’t it just yesterday that we were gathering together for Christmas, the winter holidays?  So it is that we embark on the month of love.  I say this with absolute sincerity as this is February the most lovely woman that ever walked on the earth was born.  Amanda Elizabeth, my first born.  In her I find hope encouragement, a joy that surpasses understanding.  The trials that this young woman has gone through and has been victorious is amazing,! She is undaunted by what would leave most cynical, broken, undone.  But not for my Amanda, no she is love personified.  In her little hands I see a world that goes beyond my ability to fully grasp just how beautiful this life really is.  

Her 27th birthday is this month, hard to imagine me with a 27 year old, but I rejoice that I have been there watching for almost 27 years, actually longer as I was blessed to carry her in my womb.  My desire for this month is to be more like her.  To find that peaceful center deep within no matter what the locust try to steal away from me.  My desire is to fully embrace the written word and send it spinning out of control into the cosmos with it to boomerang back at me with a force that acts as a muse only to send more and more and more out there.  I desire this month to be a month of love, a love that comes from love. 

Yes, February is the month of love and it is the month to let it overflow like a stream during a spring thaw. I want to be like a tree along that stream with blossoms just emerging with the promise of abundant fruit and thick lush leaves. I pray that the Lord Graces me with the ability to nourish, to be the shade, the place of peaceful rest, where those lost and broken, forsaken, seek this crooked, chipped, flawed tree because in it they will find solace and will be encouraged to go forth and produce equally and find hope!  

This is my desire for this month to be more like the fruit of this womb, born out of the tree of life. 

Blessings